Right as Rain
by Nattou
Summary: He spent his nights watching Bella sleep. Watching as her eyelids fluttered and incoherent phrases and words escaped her delicate mouth. Edward x Bella


**Right as Rain**

**Right as Rain © Nattou March 1st**** 2009**

**AN: **This is my very first attempt at writing anything _Twilight _related. It came to me the other night while I was listening to Yiruma's _Kiss the Rain. _One of the fan-picked versions of 'Bella's Lullaby' and I just had to write it down.

Thanks to **Ieva** and **Holly** for encouragement and beta-ing. *insert smiley here*

**Disclaimer:  
**This is a derivate piece of fiction based upon "Twilight"; Meyer, Stephenie; copyright 2005, Atom Publishers, all rights reserved. "New Moon"; Meyer, Stephenie; copyright 2007, Atom Publishers, all rights reserved. "Eclipse"; Meyer, Stephenie; copyright 2007, Atom Publishers, all rights reserved. "Twilight" copyright 2008, Summit Entertainment; all rights reserved. This work is solely intended for posting on Fanfiction, for the benefit and enjoyment of its intended audience. No commercial or financial benefit accrues or is intended to accrue to the author as a result of said posting. Any unauthorized copying or redistribution of this work might subject the party responsible for such unauthorized copying or redistribution to legal action by the owners of the aforementioned copyrights and trademarks.

~Twilight~

Silence is a source of great strength.  
~Lao Tzu

Standing in the shelter of an old pine tree, I watched as the first raindrops of the night fell from the sky. The little droplets danced in the wind until something solid blocked their way, making them stop abruptly before continuing towards the ground at a much slower pace. Each tiny drop reflected its surroundings in ways the human eye could never see. Rainbows shimmered in every drop of water at the slightest beam of light, whether it be from the sun or a streetlamp. To them the rain wasn't beautiful. It was something wet. Something cold. Something that was sure to ruin whatever plans they had made that required them to be outside for longer periods of time. To me; to me the rain was something more. What exactly I was not sure, but it never failed to soothe me, to put a damper on the otherwise noisy human world. The gentle rhythmic tapping filled my mind as it seemed to be on everyone else's minds. Even the animals curled up in whatever shelter they had created, either on the forest floor, or high on its branches.

Through the dense branches I could hear as the droplets searched for the easiest way down. Following in each other's paths they created untraceable slides down the trunk, along the branches and over the pines before reaching the goal nature had set for them; the earthy ground. Briefly closing my eyes I wondered if this was the goal nature had set for _me. _

Was it her plan to make the impossible possible? To make the predator fall in love with its prey? To make him wait for the world to go sleep so he could watch over her while she slept? It couldn't be…it didn't make sense. An image of piglets feeding of the milk of a female tiger flashed before my eyes and I sighed. That really didn't make more sense than a vampire loving a human…but what about her? Why would the prey fall in love with the predator? I shook my head slightly and took a deep breath; smelling, tasting everything around me. Rain. Earth. Cold. Her. Even from here I could smell her. _Bella. _My Bella.

As a prey she was hopeless. She lacked every defensive skill ever given to the human race, yet somehow, she was still alive. I was still not sure how. Not only was she prone to accidents, but also to lethal situations. Twice I had had to save her life from dangers she had managed to put herself in all on her own, a third time when my involvement was definitely to blame…and then there were the times that…Jacob…had saved her. I involuntarily shuddered at the memory of Laurent trying to take a bite of her, and automatically glanced towards her house. No-one would ever harm her again.

A need to be near her surged through my frozen veins and I listened intently for Charlie's thoughts. In his five tracked mind it wasn't always easy to separate his dreams from his thoughts as he seemed to focus on the same things both when alert and fast asleep; Bella, fishing, baseball, work and reasons not to trust me alone with his only daughter. It was comforting to know that at least Charlie had some functional defensive skills. Although, at the moment, it was baseball that raced through his mind, a game where he seemed to be the star, and where both Bella and her mom were cheering loudly from the stands. He was fast asleep and dreaming.

The rain was coming down more fiercely now and I knew my clothes would probably be soaked by the time I reached her room. To me the wet cold made no difference, but it did to Bella. My marble skin was already cold to Bella's touch, the last thing I needed when with her was wet clothes as well. I sighed as I judged the distance to her window, if I ran it would only take mere seconds to reach her, how wet could I possibly get in that time frame? Pulling the hood on my jacket over my head, I listened for any possible passer by's, or nosy neighbors that were still awake. Hearing nothing but the sounds of nature and quiet snoring, I leapt forward and dashed towards her house. The scenery flashed before my eyes until I was suddenly standing on her bedroom floor.

Her head whipped around to look at me as she carefully placed her book down on her lap. She was already dressed in her pj's and cuddled under her duvet. A smile spread on her face as I pulled the hood down and ran a hand through my hair. Water from my shoes and jacket created a puddle around my feet and I swiftly stepped out of the wet sneakers as I looked around for something to clean up with. A towel was draped over the old rocking chair and I quickly grabbed it, only then realizing that her hair was still wet from a shower. Taking a deep breath I could almost taste how she smelled faintly of strawberries, and smiled to myself.

I could feel her eyes burning holes in my back as I placed the damp towel on the floor and made quick work of the puddle. My jacket already hung over her desk chair, its droplets aiming obediently on the towel beneath.

Bella's breath came out slow and steady, and I knew she hadn't moved an inch. She was observing my every move and I wished once again that I could hear what was going on in her head. My Bella. My own personal mystery. Her thoughts were a well kept secret that not even Aro was in on. It was like someone had hidden these treasures in her mind, only to forget to make a map and write down the password.

She was one of a kind, and perhaps that was why I had felt so drawn to her. Perhaps Mother Nature had created her to draw _me _in. This beautiful girl that not only smelled like heaven, but also spiked my curiosity in ways I had never before experienced. This girl I had felt a compelling need to protect, not only from myself, but from every other danger she could face. It was like she was designed to give me the ultimate test of self control.

Turning around I met her deep chocolate eyes and smiled the crooked smile I knew she loved.

"You're all wet," she said quietly, nodding her head towards my soaked pants and socks. I shrugged and took a step towards her.

"It's raining," I said. She rolled her eyes before focusing on me once more. The short sleeved top she wore provided little heat, and as a gust of wind blew in through the still open window, goose bumps appeared on her bare arms. I reached out and closed the window before she had time to blink, and couldn't help but smile at the belated reaction on her face.

"Are you just going to stand there?" she finally asked.

"I'm all wet Bella," I said.

"So…take what's wet off." A faint blush tinted her cheeks as she spoke the words. I swallowed hard. Getting undressed around her was not something I had done before, nor something I had planned on doing in the near future.

"Bella…"

"What? It's not like you're going to be naked."

I closed my eyes as the image of the two of us, less than decently dressed, flashed before my eyes. Not a good train of thought I told myself as I mentally slapped my own forehead.

"Edward?" she asked tentatively.

"I…I don't think that's a good idea, love." Her face fell and I inwardly cringed. "Bella, I have trouble staying in control as it is."

"I trust you," she stated and I groaned. _But I don't trust myself._

"Please?"

I nearly growled. She knew I hated going against what she wanted, and that my weakness was her begging. Her eyes were pleading with me and I knew I was fighting a losing battle. Strength came in many packages, and I knew I had gotten more than my fair share of physical strength. My emotional strength, however, was severely lacking. One more look at her and I knew I would give in. Give in to whatever she wanted. Only when I knew I was losing control did I find it in me to push her away.

To protect her from me.

Averting my eyes for a brief second I took a step forward before looking down at her again. In the light from the bedside lamp her skin seemed paler and I gently moved my arm towards her face. The stray curl that nearly fell in her eyes was caught behind my fingers as I moved it back behind her ear.

"I'll be on the rocking chair," I whispered and leaned down to kiss her forehead. The sound of her thumping heart rang through my head as I moved away. She followed me with her eyes, shifting slightly on the bed to get a better view as I sat down. Seemingly deep in thought she bit her lower lip before falling back against her pillows. The bed squeaked at the sudden impact and she sighed before flipping the light switch on her lamp. What wouldn't I do to know what she was thinking?

Was she mad at me?

Disappointed perhaps?

Frustrated?

I sighed. It was for the best. It was what would keep her safe. She'd realize one day.

The rain drummed quietly on the roof and I found myself humming her lullaby into the now darkening room. In the pale light from the streetlamps she would have trouble seeing me, but my eyes were not limited by light. I saw her as clearly as ever. Chest moving with every breath she took, her hair fanned out over the pillow. She was awake. I could hear she was. The even breathing I knew so well was missing; and I had a feeling that it would be until she got what she wanted.

But could I give her that? Could I keep my own desires a bay?

"Bella…" I whispered.

"Hmm?"

"Sleep."

"No."

She wasn't even trying. My eyes closed in frustration as my hands moved towards my belt buckle. She was a danger to her own existence.

I swiftly pulled off the wet piece of clothing and was suddenly grateful for the darkness that surrounded us. My boxers were a little damp, but there was no way I was going to remove those.

Having heard the sound of me undressing, Bella was suddenly sitting upright in bed, her eyes wide with wonder.

I threw my jeans over the armrest and slowly walked towards the bed. Her heart rate accelerated with every step, and I couldn't help but worry if this was at all healthy for her; but her warm hand reached out for me and I knew there was no going back now. If I did it would hurt her; and hurting her emotionally made me feel no less guilty than if I hurt her physically.

"Stay under the covers," I said, trying to keep my voice normal. "You'll get cold."

She bit her lip, but stayed still as I laid down next to her. Warmth radiated off her like always, and I gently tucked the covers closer around her to keep my icy skin from affecting her too much. I knew it was unnecessary, though, as she always ended up with her head on my chest, but I had to try. A soft sigh escaped her lips before she carefully turned around to look at me. Her brown orbs were tired, but seemed more content now than when I'd left to sit on the chair.

"What are you thinking?" I gently asked as I let my fingers trail lightly across her cheek.

"That you worry too much," she said with a yawn. I sighed.

"Bella…"

"I know I know, it's for my own good." The words sounded muffled as she cuddled close to my side. Her warm breath spread across my skin, and I could feel, as well as hear, that it was slowly evening out as she allowed her body to relax.

To sleep.

The last time I had succumbed to that human need was in 1918, and since then I had lost count on how many times I had tried to remember; remember what it felt like to slip into that blissful unconsciousness, a place where anything you wanted could come true if only you dared to dream it.

I had spent countless nights watching her sleep. Watching as her eyelids fluttered and incoherent phrases and words escaped her delicate mouth.

It was one of the things I would miss the most if she got her way. When…if…._IF _she became one of us, she would never need to sleep again. Never again would she doze off on my shoulder as I drove her home, or reach out for me while mumbling my name late at night. The childlike innocence that spread across her features as she slept might never appear again, and never more would she look at me with tired, confused eyes after being pulled out of a dream.

So many things I would miss.

But. There was always a but I told myself.

My selfish self.

If she stayed human…there would come a day where I'd have to let her go; a day where she'd fade away to never again open her beautiful, deep brown eyes.

My Bella wouldn't last forever.

But forever without her was impossible. Her warm kisses would always linger on my cool skin; linger to never be renewed. A constant reminder of what had been. Of what could never be.

For a century I had exsisted without her.

Exsisted, but never fully lived.

And for two days I had thought I had lost her.

Exactly how I had gotten to Italy was still a bit of a blur. My whole world had shattered the minute I realized what had happened. What I _thought _had happened.

Submerged in the pain of my frozen heart, my existence had ceased to have meaning. Nothing I had had been strong enough to help fight off the dark that had eaten at me from the inside.

Nothing made sense without her.

But taking her human life, her _soul, _to make my own life bearable?

No.

I couldn't.

I couldn't be that selfish. No matter how much she thought wanted me to, she didn't understand what she was giving up; didn't understand that given the choice…none of us would have taken the road of forever.

Carefully I let my fingers trace the outline of her face. Her soft skin felt hot under my cold touch; and for a minute I thought it had startled her awake; but she only let out a deep sigh, lips curling into a beautiful smile before she mumbled my name and snuggled closer. How she felt comfortable I wasn't sure. To her my body was like a statue, cold and hard, yet she'd curl up to me like I was the softest pillow. How I would love to read her thoughts.

Sighing quietly I closed my eyes and listened to the world roll by outside. The rain still hit the roof in its own steady rhythm, and somewhere in the distance I swore I could hear the distinct sound of vampires playing baseball. Half a second later a violent roar of thunder shook the house and I instinctively pulled Bella closer. She stirred slightly at the sudden sound, but quickly sank back into oblivion.

I smiled down at her and quickly pressed my lips against her forehead.

Yes.

I would miss this when…_if…_if she became one of us.

Always if.

~Twilight~

**AN: **There you have it. Please tell me what you think : )

Caroline


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